hello all fellow citizen in # 1 exceptional team u$a america land of free home of brave.
today humble & honest sock monkey make 100 % complete financial disclosure at start of campaign for = mr president # 45. everything monkey reveal next down there = 100 % true because monkey never tell whopper like human politician & monkey not have anything for hide.
|100 % true finance report of candidate sock monkey|
|estimate garage sale value of sock monkey||$0.25|
|Man make contribution to campaign from beer bottle return||1.05|
|monkey find change in car & couch & chair & parking lot & etc||0.63|
|Lady give monkey money for kickstart campaign||1.00|
|lottery ticket monkey not cash in yet but pretty soon||2.00|
|all $ in stock & bond & foreign investment & secret account & etc||0|
|all total property monkey own all over earth planet||0|
|value of personal possession of monkey = used pirate costume||3.00|
|$ from super pac & plutocrat slimebag||0|
|rainy day extra $ monkey keep safe in jar behind washing machine||0.06|
|speaking engagement fee monkey collect in last five year||0|
|wingnut & whackdoodle & corporation & lobbyist gift to monkey||0|
|all other income & asset||0|
|now add up worth of candidate sock monkey||$7.99|
goodbye today reader. monkey hope reader see independent & honest & humble middle class candidate monkey = # 1 champion & friend of all mans & ladies & littles on team u$a & it time for help spread word that monkey not = democrap & monkey not = republicrap.
vote for crapless monkey in 2016!
if reader see ad come next down there IT NOT FROM SOCK MONKEY. it there because Man = too 100 % cheap for pay $$$ every year for remove ad thing from blog.